Best of intentions

Wow! How does time really go by so fast! My New Years Resolution LAST year was to do more blogging and knew time had gotten away from me, but seriously, a year??!!! Oy vey!

So we have been in the stx-209 world for a little over a year now and its crazy how different it is.  Logan is saying more words every day, and my mom even mentioned the other day that you could actually carry on a conversation with him now! He is a little more tolerant of change and the unexpected and much more aware of his social circle and for the first time in his 9 years on this earth, he had a REAL birthday party, at Chuck E Cheese no less! Kids and adults both stop me at school and talk to me about Logan and how sweet he is and how funny he is and how much he likes pigs!  He has actually achieved some IEP goals and all the comments say how far he has come.

However, as good as things are, Logan doesn’t get up in the morning and take his pill, suddenly turning into the “typical” child.  We STILL have meltdowns, though they are infrequent, he still doesn’t understand “sharing”, especially with his sister and as far as he has come at school, his last report card came home with UNSATISFACTORY in the CORE subjects of Math, Reading, English. I was okay with it because of all the good things his progress report said.  But, then this weekend  we got a letter from the school saying that he is in danger of not advancing to the next grade.  He is already 9 years old and repeated every grade, so while his typically developing peers are in 3/4 grades, he is still in first and they want to hold him back again?? My heart sinks and as strong as I am at times, I feel a sudden panic and all my insecurities come rolling back in like the tides.  As the parent of a child with special needs, with a disability, I have had to come to the realization that he will probably not be a surgeon, or a lawyer or president one day but one of the things I have stayed true to is that I want him to have an education.  An education is something you earn, something that no one can ever take away from you. But it seems to be one of the things we struggle with.

If only there was a magic pill to fix that!

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